December 12, 2012

It’s Not You, It’s Me… Not Just A Classic Breakup Line Anymore

Have you ever been frustrated with people you work or live with? Have you ever been so hurt, you just want to quit? I know how it can be! You […]

Have you ever been frustrated with people you work or live with? Have you ever been so hurt, you just want to quit? I know how it can be! You get frustrated with people and then it’s like you can’t even focus on a single task. All the sudden you spend a day, or 3, or a month being ticked off and tossing around an emotional knot in your stomach.

It happens to all of us. Today I really want to help you. I want to give you just a small insight that can help you stop wasting time on negativity, decrease your stress level, and ultimately make you more money!

After all, where does money come from? People always tell you where money does NOT come from. ‘”Well, money doesn’t grow on trees.” Boy, wouldn’t it be great if someone stopped that person right there and just asked, “Oh, well then where does money come from?” How dumbfounded do you think they would be? We are so quick to pick out the negative, instead of stopping and figuring out where it does come from!

The short and long answer is that money comes from OTHER PEOPLE. Hello! Your bank account is directly correlated to your people skills. If your bank account is small, it probably means you aren’t that great with people. When you increase your people skills, you decrease your stress, save money, and increase your income. When you learn how to communicate with people in such a way that they fall in love with you, you will be less stressed about finding more clients and you will actually earn more money.

Many are called to lead, but very few will actually step up, learn, and be equipped on how to deal with people. So few make that investment, and these skills are so simple and yet so profound, I guarantee they will set you apart from your everyone. If you want to get noticed, this is it! Open your ears (or eyes, I guess).

  • Quit trying to change people!

You can’t change other people, so stop trying! You can only change how you deal with them! If you don’t learn to accept, love, and honor people as they are – I promise you will always be disappointed. Stop waiting for people to be what YOU want them to be! Instead, motivate and encourage them for their strengths instead of condemning every weakness.

  • Changes start with you. (It’s not you, it’s me – not just a classic break up line anymore!)

Think about it, when you have trouble with others, it is always their fault. People aren’t trustworthy, people are negative, people don’t say what they mean. You just can’t communicate with them because they’re so negative! The challenge you have with them isn’t because they’re negative, it is because of the way you deal with it. Often times, the people around you reflect your attitude, insecurities and personal issues. If you are suspicious, unfriendly, and condescending, you will find those traits everywhere you look.

Start by honoring and encouraging others. People want to feel special and important, so be genuinely interested in them! Try picking out their good qualities instead of just focusing on what you don’t like. And tell the person you like that quality in them!

I’m sorry to tell you that people are everywhere. You sit next to them at the doctor’s office. You buy coffee from them. You probably live with them. And you maybe even gave birth to one (or five). You really have no choice but to interact with them.

The most successful and wealthy businessmen have fantastic people skills! It starts with realizing that if you want to be good with people, it isn’t about you. It isn’t about your product. It is about them. If you want people to like you and if you want to increase your circle of influence you have to genuinely CARE about others.

Try finding a need and filling it. Refer people to businesses/others within your network. ‘”Hey you need XYZ? I know a great person for that!” If you hear someone needs a good realtor who can sell, ask for their number and tell them you may know someone! You may have just helped increase a friend’s income while gaining the trust and respect from others at the same time.

98% of the population is busy blaming other people, and making excuses for why they can’t be successful. And so few are heeding the call to leadership. Leadership is about cutting the excuses, stopping the blame game, stopping the negativity and working towards a solution. Instead of nitpicking, choose to support! If we all stopped talking about what wasn’t working and started discussing solutions on how to make things better, wow! Wouldn’t life be a lot less stressful? If people stopped telling you all the places where money can’t be found and told you how to earn it and gain wealth! And wow, how that voice of encouragement and support stands out in the crowd! In a world full of betrayal and nagging, what do you think stands out more? Mocking and being sarcastic towards someone or making them feel important?

My homework for you today, so you start applying these skills, is to tell someone thank you! When was the last time you thanked your spouse for cooking or for doing the dishes? When was the last time you told your manager they were doing a great job and you appreciated them? Did you thank your kids for cleaning up after themselves?  

Our site, at the very top reads ‘”Your change starts here.” And it does, it starts right here, right now, with you. How are YOU going to change how you treat others?

In geat faith,

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