One thing that lays heavy on my mind today is a message for you men out there. But it’s also a message for you women who have important men in your life, whether he’s your husband, your children, your father, your friends, or even your co-workers.
In my past, I was a total man-hater. I had grown up with an extremely abusive man who I thought was my father. He was 6’10", 350 pounds, and he abused me verbally, emotionally, physically, and sexually. I found out when I was almost 18 that he was not even my father. I was betrayed by my first love. And then after all that, I married a man I had only known for a week, who ended up abandoning me and left me homeless with $2.03 to my name.
I had grown to hate men and blame them for my lot in life. When I met Hans, (my current husband whom I have been married to for going on 20 years) I never thought my past would affect our marriage. When we were dating and living together, things were great. I respected him and loved him.
But then when we got married it was like this switch got flipped. Suddenly, something changed in me. I so desperately wanted him to protect me and provide for me. I wanted him to be a real man, a real husband, and a real father to my little girl. I was looking for a leader, but all of a sudden, Hans couldn’t live up to my expectations. I degraded him and emasculated him daily. Why couldn’t he just be a man?
I was a woman who put down my husband and destroyed his manhood. I cut him down daily. I wrote him scathing letters about how I despised him and what a worthless piece of crap he was. And then he would go work out 5 nights a week and never want to be around me. Can you blame him?
The reason I’m telling you all this today is because we live in a very confused culture. We have women who are doing things to emasculate men, some without even realizing it. And then we have men who have no idea what their role is in the home, the workplace, and in society. But what else would you expect?
Our society has such a messed up, pathetic, skewed concept of what a man is supposed to be. We have torn men down and have raised women up to a position where they are expected to carry things they were never meant to carry.
I think we’re in big trouble today because we started out, however many generations ago, when women decided to burn their bras and prove they’re just as strong and as smart as men. Was that really a good idea? Just look at the outcome! Most of us do not realize the impact it has had on us…
It has impacted business, finances, and marriages. In fact, a lot of people aren’t even getting married today! A lot of women have this idea of, "I don’t need a man. I can just go to a sperm bank and get what I need."
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So many of us have gotten caught up in the idea that we are all equal, but the truth is men and women are very different. We think different. We react different. We have different roles in family, work, and society.
Looking back through human history, men have always responded to one thing. And that was the call to battle. The men would fight to protect the honor and safety of their families, their loved ones, and their values. And I don’t just mean physical battles. Even starting a new business is a battle in today’s society. Being a leader is a real battle.
Unfortunately, men today certainly aren’t getting any encouragement from society to step into these roles. There is no call to battle. But it was only when I started treating Hans like the man I wanted him to be that I saw him step up and become that man. When I encouraged him, he answered the call.
Last year on one of my nationally syndicated radio shows, I had my husband come on to talk about this topic a little bit. Right there, live on air, I asked him what I do that makes him really feel like a man. His answer amazed me. He said, "There is nothing more powerful than positive reinforcement. And on the flip side, there is nothing more destructive than negative reinforcement. When you made that change in our relationship, it really started to plant seeds in me that helped me realize that I really could be who I needed to be for you. It has been a really amazing journey."
Here’s the bottom line: If you want to start seeing changes, it must start in your own home. Are you encouraging your brother, father, spouse? Are you grooming your sons to become real men? Do you build up your male friends and co-workers?
The world today is a battlefield, and there is a real need for strong men to rise up and take their place in business, in the home, and in their relationships. It is time for the men in today’s world to get equipped to become real leaders.
So it is up to you and me to get this message out there. Please join me in sharing this message with every man and woman you know. Share this post on Facebook and Twitter. It’s time to start grooming people up to be the leaders they were born to be!
After you share this message, please leave me a comment. I really would love to know what you think about today’s Daily Fix. This is a topic that is so important to me because I’ve seen how it has affected my own life, and the lives of so many others around me. So I would love to hear what impact this has had on you - I want to hear from the men AND women today!
Have an awesome Thursday, and until next time, God bless!
In great faith,
Hi Dani,
I get something from all your mails but this one is really on target for my situation. My husband and I, both christians now, have been married 26 years. We have 4 sons and a daughter and have had this similar role struggle for all our married life. I was brought up in a family of 6 siblings and my mum was widowed at a young age. I took on a lot of responsibility from the age of 9 and we had many struggles. My husband was the youngest boy of 6 children with 3 older sisters who bossed him around and babied him. You can imagine what our backgrounds have brought in to the mix of our marriage! God is finally straightening us out and your mail is another step along the way. I need to encourage my husband, who is a good man, and give him the respect and encouragement he needs without freaking out and carrying all the responsibility which just leaves me stressed. Thanks for this message. Bless you. It’s good to know that even successful people like yourselves face the same battles I do.
Lilly, your awesome lady!!!
This hit home for me! At first I felt like I had to carry the responsibility to care for the family. But I finally let go and let God, things are much better. Yes I do agree that we need to start lifting up our men and encouraging them. I felt like this post needs s standing “o”,…Amen Dani.
I so know what you are talking about. The pain we women put ourselves through is ridiculous! Thanks for the comment.
Thanks for writing this. Men need respect. I recently wrote this about the same topic and I think you will appreciate it.
http://www.jeffdrummer.com/how-to-be-a-real-man
Hi Dani. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years. Throughout the years there have been overwhelming lies and deceit that I have confronted and then just tried to overlook. I know that I have definitely been guilty of emasculating him in the past because of feelings of disappointment and sometimes even feelings of regret. I have realized my own faults and changed my behavior towards him by raising him up and encouraging him with words of praise, comfort and support. Although these actions can definitely change the interaction that you and your partner have in the open air between each other momentarily, i have not seen the real deep change that absolutely needs to happen in order for our relationship to survive. I’ve suggested counseling for us and even suggessted to listen to your recordings together without any success. I am truly at a loss.
Girl, should you be with a man who lies? Something to think about? When there is no trust before marriage…oh boy there is NONE after.
I agree but lets say that I was married to this man, and deceit was discovered after years of being together, would your response be different? Would you suggest to ‘work these issues out’? When do you work through your relationship (marriage or not) and when do you leave?
You are the only one who knows the answer to whether or not you should leave. The better question might be why you have to question whether or not you deserve a healthy relationship, and what past experiences allow you to believe it’s okay to be with some one who cannot be honest and true. Grab a piece of paper and a pen. Write down all the qualities of an ideal man. If you do not have a good personal example of an ideal man, recall the things that you don’t want, but write down the opposite of those attributes( instead of dishonest, of course write down honest honest, kind, good communicator, listener etc). AIM HIGH, ask for EXACTLY what you want! This is important. Next write down the attributes you have or the attributes you are requiring to be worthy of such a person. You deserve nothing less, and if you don’t think you deserve to be with a king, you need to explore the reasons why you believe such a lie. Pray over it daily. God will give you clarity, and he will grant you the strength necessary to follow the best course of action. You have to find your own answers, so best of luck!
Great post Dani…authentic as always:)
I agree! So good.
You two are so kind. Thanks for the comment.
i really appreciate your courage to put this topic so aptly. thank you so much.
Dani,
You are so courageous to expose your life story vulnerability!
I do play that super strong woman role that scares men on their bones! As a single mom, I had to develop more of a Yang (masculine) qualities, that are now very settled in my personality. Your text invites me to contemplate the effect it has on the man I relate to on a intimate level. Even though I take issue about it on a deep level, it is a difficult fix.
My best, Sandra.
I love how open you are to communicate what you just said. How did you hear about us?
Lack of nurturing and protection drive women to take the steering wheel of life to take care of the family and represent G-d. However, the reason anxiety, stress and fear come upon a woman under those circumstances is that she was not made to be the stronger vessel. 1 Peter 3:7 This does not mean she is weak mentally or before G-d. It means in G-d’s order she is designed to be a helpmeet to her husband. This reality is possible IF the man takes his rightful place place in the home, in love. Proverbs 31:11-12 If men want their wife to love them they need to take time to get their priorities reconstituted and get hot towrd G-d first. And let G-d teach you how to represent the G-dhead in your family.
This is awesome! I thank Jesus The Christ everyday for my wife. Daughters of the most high God are not easy to find. Being married for 12 years now, I agree with Hans. I did not truly understand my role as a husband until I starting hearing the refreshing words of a caring wife encouraging me to go on! When the encouragement started, the purpose of covenant marriage became a little more clearer for my wife and I! We continue to experience a deeper love with each other more and more everyday! They ask what helps a man to be a Husband once in this role? Encouragement! Thank you so much Dani for being a mirror for so many of God’s children including myself, my wife, and my four children! I hope what you have said today, sows a seed deep into the hearts of daughters, so that husbands can take back there families and wives will be there encouragement!
John, wow!! I love what you wrote!! Thank you.
Dani this is so true! I just got married a little over a year ago. Due to my frustrations I started doing what you described doing to Hans early on. He was not living up to what I thought he should be. So I starting digging deep for Godly advice regarding marriage. Everything I read, one thing kept popping out, and this was change starts with you. I thought to myself “well he needs to change”! It was only when I starting changing my reactions to things that he started coming around, warming up and telling me how he couldn’t wait to come home. I really feel, well I know, God was speaking to me regarding this. I still have not perfected it but I am telling you I agree with what you said above, it works!
So proud of you!!! Great job makin those changes….stay the coarse…your marriage will be the envy of everyone. How did you hear about us?
I’m from Redding so I think we went to school briefly together?? Country Chrisitan…
That is how I know of you and what you do…Redding is a small town!
Great article Dani. I’m an unemployed Husband and Father of 3 now including an 11 year old boy that sees me not working and that bothers me. I appreciate you willingness to share your past experiences and bring this topic to the public. “A Call to Battle” in today’s society for a man can be a tough one but with the support and encouragement of your spouse, family, and inspirational leaders like you – it’s a battle we can win.
Yes you can and will!! I am so sorry to here about the employment issue. Have you heard about and used Job Domination? We have had so many men find greater jobs with using that training series. It will work for you as well.
Wow Tom. That must be tough. I believe you are right though… I believe it is a battle you can win! My friend Paul Wessling, had been in a decent paying job, but his company was in the process of laying off a bunch of people, including many who had been there for 25 years. He used Dani’s Job Domination training and his company literally created a brand new position for him in the middle of all the layoffs.
Tom, it worked for Nate and Paul, and I am confident that it will work for you too! Bless you, my friend! http://www.danijohnson.com/offers/solutions/job-domination/
This is another amazing article! Dani thanks for keeping us on track!
Thank you for your encouragement. You amaze me lady.
Wasn’t it awesome?! I love that Dani cares enough about people to take the time to send out these messages every day.
Mary, thanks for all you help, support and encouragement!
Thank you Danni for writing this. I have struggled with learning how to be married when the culture of the past 20 years has failed to teach me these truths. I am now working on teaching this to the young wives in our EOD Army unit, there is so much confusion in the home and then PTSD from war and I am tired of witnessing abuse, addiction and divorce. I think if I can teach these young wives what true strength in the home really looks like, how men crave respect, and that it is an honor to be a part of our soilder’s mission–I think this will strengthen our military from within.
I am so with you lady. Please pass this article on to those hurting families. The pain is so deep. Thank you for what you are doing to help.
You’re right Dani, and this causes me to think that when 20 yrs ago everyone was proclaiming “burn the bra” I think both men and women burned the book of common sense with it.
It is good to hear someone else say what I have been trying to say to people for years. We each have our places and strengths, we just need to put into balance.
In my experience, when a man or a woman feels their spouse does not measure up it is usually becase they have made it difficult for their spouse by witholding real unconditional love like it is some kind of reward for getting the behavior they want. That is NOT UNconditional love people! When you love unconditionally and give your spouse what they need regardless of what you want from them you will see amazing things happen. So stop being mean and do what you said you were going to do when you wed that person- love them unconditionally. When you do your life will change forever.
Bravo, good LADY! I hear male relationship experts talk about this a lot, and women talk about what they expect out of their man, and what to look for, but rarely do I hear women say “you want your man to be a STUD MUFFIN? Treat him like one.”
This was a great pre-marriage “gift” for me to see…
Great article. I totally agree with what you say. I really learn from your articles. Have you ever heard of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints? (The Mormons). The values they teach about marriage and families is right up your alley. You would appreciate their materials on the issues surrounding families in today’s world.
OMG! YES!
I so know what this is like….Back in my mid 20′s I had a drink problem.
This problem was due to my haunts of child abuse and a emotional abusive affair I had with my boss at the age of 22.
When I was 25 I had a relationship with someone for 5 years and in that time I became the abuser!. When I had a glass of wine or 6! I would then lash out at this man I was with. I would shout abuse at him, put him down and I even cheated on him a few times too, but never could understand why??..I just felt so much anger and directed it towards him..I had gone from being abused to being the abuser, and it was like I had no control over it…and most of the time I never remembered what I said to him.
He would tell me the next day when I was sober and I could hardly believe them things came out my mouth, it was like he was telling me about somebody else doing this to him.
Now all of this really didn’t come to light till last year when I became the founder of a global domestic violence campaign and becoming a life coach..When I sat down to write my life story is when it had hit me..My gosh I had been abused then become an abuser!…So yeah it was a major wake up call.
This is why in my campaign (www.freedomandempowermentcampaign). we support men, women & Children ..because I now know first hand at what some poor men deal with on a daily basis…becuase I was the cause at one point.
I am currently 3/4 of the way through First Steps To Wealth (Great Book By The Way)
Blessings
Kate xx
Dani,
Today as I have done a lot of prayer and meditation, I have felt a sense of pain that was stuck in chest, not realizing where it came from. When I came across your article today, it moved me so much I cried, and I cried.. I realized the pain was from my past relationship, of the things I know I could have done better, and all the weight on my shoulders for raising my boys alone. Sometimes it is so heavy it gets hard to breathe. But, today I now feel more free. Letting it all go, and realizing that I don’t have to do it all, and that I can provide the space for the next great man to come into my life and be just that ‘The Man’.
I am a Women, not a Man, and I don’t have to carry it all nor do it alone. When I read your words, it was like my story was popping out of the page.
Thank you for sharing this and being so real that we can relate with, connect to, and be a part of.
Great article on men and woman.. I cried all the way thru it. I married a lovely woman, in a Jesus name pentacostal church. I came from a family that went to church two or three times a year RC’s, then the rest of the year where alcoholics. When I joined the Pentacostals ,I gladly assumed the roles they directed. About a year after our son was born , I started to ask for marriage information from my wife ,then from the pastor,I felt something was wrong. I got real negative responses from both.
I noted the results,put my head down and went to work ,I ignored the warnings. My wife at this time stayed home with our new son.I immersed myself in work to support wife and kid. A couple a years later we had a girl. My wife and I grew apart after I asked her to start working. Her father is a leading pastor himself that she greatly admires. . We moved to accomidate my work. I become a strong leader in my work. She become like her dad in her field of work, She dominated, was flawless,very good with people, a leader a doer. When things were not going well,she would confront me,about said topic. I acquired verbal skills training from my mother ,and sister i dominated plus work related problem solving skills. 20 years later , my health failed me , I was exhausted, I couldn’t handle the arguments any more. we divorced. My industry was wiped out (construction). I had to move to find work.( 1500 miles) I had to leave my kids. When I settled down at the new location,I sought out doctors for my health. I was told that i need to changed occupations and move south. I am in chonic pain. I felt as if I was hit by some sort of cosmic tsunami. Now I am focusing on being a better me and 100,000 idea’s. thanks for the great read Howard.
Dani,
Thank you for bringing up the subject of real men
I do agree, men need more encouragement
and I urge women to lift up the men in their
Lives, men need to lead, and women have to
allow the men to do so. Dani good topic, it
is all about relationships, one of the biggest
Issues both men and women are facing today
Thank you for sharing your testimony. The bible says that man was not made for woman, but woman was made for man. 1 Corinthians 11:3, 8-9 This does not give the man the right to be chauvinistic or oppressive; this has to do with G-d’s order. So, we forgive those that have not done right. And, we forgive ourselves for reacting wrongfully. Depending on the situation, G-d is always willing to restore a relationship. And yet, depending on the relation, this does not mean we hang out with them. But, we move on in freedom. Either way there is freedom in forgiveness.
Great article, I believe the women’s rights movement did have a good purpose initially, as some things did need to change. Women did need to realize that they could earn money on their own, that they did not have to stay in abusive marriages because they could not support themselves,and that their work is just as valuable as men, and they are not property. It started to get crazy and extreme, however, when women’s rights became equated with the degradation of men, not needing a man at ALL, and sexual “freedom”. We need each other, and both sides have been abusive, so EVERYONE needs to grow up and realize everyone’s role are extremely important. Men need to see how to be a real man. We need to stop supporting media that makes young boys think that being a man is about having lots of material things and sleeping with lots of women. We need to stop telling boys that they cannot express their feelings. I’m so tired of this stupid war of the sexes that grown people keep perpetuating. The sad part is, it’s the children that suffer the most, growing up with poor self esteem and utterly being confused and dysfunctional. Let’s get it together, we can make things right.
Well said.
Thank you Dani for sharing your story. I had a very similar story, if not worse. However, through it all, I found Jesus and my perspective on life and discovery of my self worth changed my life. Abuse no longer prevails in my life, which has given me freedom to love the way God loves me.
I am moving forward now, and when I heard about you, I was inspired deeply.
Thank you for all that you do; especially, for the impact you have on people’s relationships.
I continue to think about how we start our journey then how we end it. I bet you never thought, when you were living your 17 yr old life that you would be a world reknown ENCOURAGER and MENTOR to hundreds of thousands!!! LOL……..Now, I digress. This article IS GOD-ORDAINED, Dani and about as timely as the breath I breathe. When men are degraded as youngsters then marry the same time of female, the set up is HORRIBLE. How they survive & THRIVE from that beginning is almost impossible. But God…..He has a plan and that is for those guys to finally come into relationship with ladies like us who have also been redeemed and know the power of SPEAKING LIFE: a term my husband had never heard until we met 9 years ago. When we understand the power of speaking life, we produce wealth, in every area of our lives. We redeem all the time the enemy has stolen from us.We become victorious families in spite our painful upbringing! We change our area of influence with OUR STORY, just like you, Dani!
I am a single parent or at least parent alone…I have only 1 son and he is surrounded by girls (3+me) in total I have 4 children. To say the least I have my hands full. However, I need to raise a real man I have learned so much from this! I will start today with my son and my household!
What a perfect read for me today. Love this. I will be printing this off and sharing with the ladies in my study group, we are currently reading Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, it fits in perfectly. I will also read this to my husband tonight and hopefully be humble enough to open the conversation and hear what he has to say to me about how I treat him and how I can change the negative and show him the respect and love he needs.
I went through this too. My wife walked out on our marriage after 4 years. Unfortunately, she had a very similar childhood as you did Dani – an alcoholic, verbal and sexually abusive father. Add to that a mother that developed paranoid schizophrenia when my wife was 10. I came from a very loving family where you worked out your problems. Also, my dad was the breadwinner and my mom raised the kids. For us too, after we were married it was like this level of expectation grew hugely from my wife for me to be something super human. I did so much to love her and care for her, be dependable the way her parents weren’t, but she was never happy. She went into therapy for repressed memories that began to surface and I supported her in this time. I read books to better understand what she was going through and it was very helpful. The affects of a stolen childhood certainly echo into future relationships. We both talked about how so much of ‘our’ problems were connected to her past, but alas, it was almost like she self-sabotaged the relationship in the end and left over issues that a couple should be able to work out. But to be honest…I’m glad that it has ended. I’m a good man. I did what I could for her. But in retrospect, I was being abused by her verbally. My self esteem as a man was bruised and it’s taken me a long time to regain my self confidence. I totally agree with you, men and women are very different and how we were raised and what situations we grew up in can have a major affect on our love relationships. One other thing I will add is that I’m all for ‘independent women,’ but when women act like men because of what society and the feminist message seems to teach them to be like, I think that you have to look at the consequences for the way in which men and women get along romantically because of those messages. In my opinion, it’s not good! I love women for being women. It’s not attractive to me (and to many of my male friends I’ve polled) when women don’t give men the space to be men. It’s a very confusing world for the two sexes to find a way to be together harmoniously. I think that the breakdown of the traditional family is a major contributing factor to why successful marriages are so rare these days. My 2 cents.
Dani, I am a single mother of a 10-yr-old son. How can I best prepare him to be a real man — a man of God and one who respects women and accepts his role as a leader?
Awesome article. I’m so glad that you and Hans have overcome the obstacles that came against your marriage. You and Hans are an inspiration to many married couples and to entrepreneurs.
Amazing! This is just what our society needs! I wish more woman would treat their man like a man!
Great article on not tearing your man or household down Dani. I am 55 years old and in the past year have just started to learn to be a much better manager of my anger and self control. I have noticed my wife treating me better lately and I can’t help but think that part of that is because I am doing a better job of building her up and respecting her. It feels like she is much more on my side now than it ever has before.
Thanks so much for getting this message out. I recently took a class at a church regarding this same message for women. It was very informative and I learned a great deal. I am on such a journey right now to change the very aspect you were discussing. It is really hard to step back and let my husband lead. Unfortunately, I also have a past that haunts me and am in the process of letting go. I feel much regret for all the years we have been fighting one another. It is terrible that there has been so much wasted time, but it is time to move past my past. Have a great day Dani. I am so glad to have found your site.
OK…I just read this right after I my husband and I had a pretty heated disagreement. He went to sleep and I’m really seeking God’s perspective here. Instead of stewing over everything I could be upset about, I wrote him a thank you note which includes a list of all the things he’s done in the last few days to show affection toward me. It’s now on the refrigerator, I feel a lot better, and I’m going to bed at peace. I am totally expectant to see the man of my life rise up and take his place in every area of his life! Thank you Dani–you are a true inspiration to me.
As usual Dani you are so spot on! Feminism was nothing but a movement of EGO and the ripple effect of it has caused so much damage to the world today. We are designed in such a way that the man is to be the leader, but it is the way that they cherish the women in their life that means that power is deserved and their position not abused. How can a man cherish someone that is constantly challenging him in his role though? Understanding the roles correctly shows that it isn’t about one sex being more valuable or more worthy than another, simply knowing what their part is. In reality, the role of building up another and surrendering yourself to their leadership is much harder to live daily, hence why it was given to women as we have been designed with that specific internal strength to support. In the time things starting going wrong women should have taken a look at how they were treating the men in their lives and how to instead be that inspiring support to turn the cycle back around, instead, ego driven, they made it so much worse. This is a cause very close to my heart. Thank you for stepping up and making this statement.
Such wonderful advise, and so timely . . .Thank you, Dani, and all others who opened up, for sharing your thoughts and stories. It helps my heart at a time when I have some confusion about my boyfriend. Seems like every day is a battle in dealing with his huge negativity, depression and problems. I try to be encouraging, and uplifting, but I am not getting too far. Dani, even though he wants no part of your teachings, your daily letters are a real blessing and lifeline for me. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
My husband & I will be married 40 years this year. We seriously take our marriage for granted, so I don’t know how we have stayed together for so long. We don’t work at our marriage. I would rate our marriage as a 9.5 out of 10 now. I wonder how much better it would be if we worked at it. We have never called each other bad names nor fought so bad that one had to leave the room. I have total respect & support for my husband & he also does for me. He is my MAN.
Dani, This really hit home. I have been married for 24 years and love my husband deeply. We have 4 beautiful girls and provide a Godly home for them. But life has been hard the last few years. Our business has suffered and financially we have struggled greatly. My husband feels like he has failed us. I don’t feel that way about him at all. But, I think I have added to his feelings. He gave up a year or so ago. I did not. I stepped up to the plate and took the role of provider and got another job and started a home business and provided for my family. I did everything I could to provide for our needs, as any mother would. I didn’t know what else to do and still dont know how to “fix it”.But, I am glad that I plugged into your training and hope and pray that God will restore our marriage and family and business so that it glorifies God in every way.
I cannot agree more with this statement and I am so glad that I get to learn this without having to learn from mistakes.
I thank god that he is equipping me and teaching me through his servants before I engage in a relationship.
Dani you are such an Inspiration! I came to first steps in London yesterday and it transformed my mind and life. I look forward to putting everything in to practice and can hardly wait for dynasty!
Nita
Hello Dani been there done that have my own t shirt.
it’s so true
Very well done Dani.I was once in the same with my ex husband,no longer exist because I left because he wasn’t trying to be the man that he needed to be and I wasn’t putting him down because that’s not who I am as a women.He wasn’t being the man like he should have because of the way his mother was treating him like a boy,it seem to me that he just couldn’t leave the boy hood to to be a real man.It was very hard for me to tolerate because I have three boys and I didn’t want them to be expose to that type of not being a real man.Now that the boys are older,I always tell them not to compare themselves to no man but be better at whatever they are trying to do in their life.The boys are doing great and I inform my boys to follow their own footsteps because following other people steps will land you in a deep hole with no ladder to get out of.I’m not in a relationship right now because I’m working on my self so when the time is right for me to date again,it will be flourish with love,respect and power.I do have some men friends who I speak to on a regular bases and I always encourage them to do the right thing in life and be leaders not following behind their friends footsteps.This is a great article and I need to pass this along to some of my people.Thanks so much,may God bless you.