January 14, 2013

Your Stress-Free Guide To Achieving Goals

I thought about you after I had a conversation with someone last week. I want to share that conversation with you today because I know you will benefit greatly from […]

I thought about you after I had a conversation with someone last week. I want to share that conversation with you today because I know you will benefit greatly from it.

Last Wednesday night, I had a discussion with Rayven, who is an amazing and fun young lady that I get to work with every day. She helps me with our social media, and I’m sure you’ve seen her or talked with her on our Facebook page. (If you haven’t joined us on Facebook yet, go on over there and meet this community of awesome, supportive people who are dedicated to moving their lives forward.)

So during this conversation, Rayven said to me, "Dani, I just don’t know what to do. I am so stressed out about this goal I have. I want to pay off $5,000 by March, and then I’ll be totally debt free." (She has already paid off almost $18,000 in the last 9 months…)

I asked why that goal stresses her out, and she told me, "Because I’ve crunched the numbers, and it’s virtually impossible. I’ve already cut everything down and I’m trying really hard to make it happen. I’ve sold everything I can. Should I get a part-time job? Or should I start a business on the side?"

I then replied, "Well, why don’t you move the date? Why do you have such a tight deadline?" Rayven said, "I feel like it won’t be a good story unless I do it that fast."

So to clarify, I asked, "So basically you’re telling me that you’ve set a goal that is stressing you out just so you can have a big story to tell?"

You should have seen her…

Her head shrunk down into her shoulders and she got this sheepish look on her face as I asked her, "So if it takes you 18 months to pay off all of your debt, that will not be a good story?"

Rayven’s answer was this: "Well, no. Because So-and-So paid off half a million dollars of debt in 18 months!"

I said, "Girlfriend, pull out your measuring stick you’re using to measure your goal! I’m going to break it over your head!!!"

Because here’s the thing: You have to look at the motives for your goal. If your motive is to impress other people, you’ve got the wrong goal. And what kind of measuring stick are you using to determine whether or not what you’re doing is impressive?

Rayven’s measuring stick was comparing her goal to someone else who had paid off half a million dollars of debt in 18 months. But the reality is, they sold a house in order to pay off that debt. Rayven doesn’t have a house to sell. And all she has left is part of her student loan, and then she will be completely debt free! But she was using a completely unrealistic measuring stick and trying to get a big WOW story to impress other people instead of just focusing on paying off her debt.

If paying off all your debt and being debt free within 18 months is not impressive to you, I guarantee it’s because you are trying to compete against someone else’s story.

Don’t compete with anyone else! Set a goal and give yourself a timeline that you know you can accomplish. Don’t stress yourself out. Work a simple formula to get it done, and then – BAM – you will achieve it!

What are your goals? Do you have any adjusting to do? Have you ever stressed yourself out over a goal? I want to hear your stories! Please scroll down to leave me your comments.

And if this message has impacted you in any way, go ahead and share it with anyone you think may benefit from it.

That’s it for me. Have an awesome day, and we’ll talk soon! God bless!

 

In great faith,

 

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Categories: Goals   

Tags: article   stop comparing yourself to others   The Daily Fix   

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