February 13, 2014

Does "I Do" Mean You "Don’t" Anymore?

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, this seems like a good time to talk with you about sex. Yep, I said sex! This topic seems to have all kinds […]


With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, this seems like a good time to talk with you about sex. Yep, I said sex! This topic seems to have all kinds of baggage, stigma and judgments attached to it. Either people are too scared or embarrassed to discuss it.

And, this is SUCH a tragedy because, believe it or not, sex plays a huge role in ALL aspects of your life! So put away any religious judgments or your blushing cheeks so you and I can have an honest conversation here.

According to the Huffington Post, 6 out of 10 men and 5 in 10 women believe a good sex life is a critical part of a healthy relationship. At the same time 54% of men and 42% of women are unhappy with how often they “do it!” That isn’t surprising considering David Schnarch (co-director of the Marriage & Family Health Center) states only 1 in 4 married couples have sex at least once a week. Only one-quarter, imagine that!

Studies have shown that when couples stop having sex, their relationship becomes vulnerable to anger, detachment, infidelity and ultimately, divorce.

If you are in a sexless (or nearly-sexless) marriage, ask yourself WHY? The top reasons are usually a symptom of a bigger problem! Biological changes, depression, children, lack of energy, sleep deprivation, lack of respect or trust, jealousy, resentment and low self-esteem.

Maybe your spouse is dealing with the problems, but have you considered how you have sown into that? And, how can you fix it?

But, first just know, you were SOLD a fantasy that being married and staying married is about “being in love.” That simply isn’t enough! You can’t use that as an excuse for not dealing with your own inner issues. A marriage requires WORK, not just warm, romantic “feelings.”

With Valentine’s Day less than 24 hours away, this is the perfect time to rejuvenate your sex life. Turn up the heat and get back on track to a happier relationship. How did you first “woo” your spouse? When was the last time you sent him or her a flirty text?

Every part of your marriage takes effort, including romance. Don’t get stuck in a cycle of a sexless, miserable relationship. Stop feeding into your excuses. “As human beings, we are hard-wired to crave a special sense of intimacy with another human being. That is why people who are in a sexless relationship feel lonely, hard, depressed and emotionally unfulfilled.” ~ Mike Fox, guest contributor to the Christian Post

What are some of your best flirting tips? Are you continually pursuing that intimate relationship with your spouse? Let me know your thoughts, leave a comment and make sure to Like and Share today’s post.

While I have you here, I want to invite you to have lunch with us tomorrow. We’ll be here on The Dani Johnson Show at 12 pm ET/11 am CT for more tips, strategies and skill sets to improve your life.


In great faith,


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Categories: Relationships   

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