Have you ever been in the midst of a bad situation and just responded the wrong way? Looking back, you wish you’d have handled it better? We have all been in situations like that. I’m not sure if you’ve noticed or not, but there is a lot of hostility in the world today!

I’m sure someone has stolen from you, treated you badly, lied about you or used you and then thrown you away like yesterday’s trash. In my life, I know I’ve experienced similar hurt again and again.

I’m here to inform you that on occasion, certain things don’t have to be a part of your life. Unfortunately, in this case, I can’t. Hurt really IS a part of life. People will hurt you. They will mess up, take offense, lash out or revisit some childhood trauma all directed straight to YOU. And there is nothing you or I can do to change that. You can’t control people!

There is one thing you can control, which is your response to others. Reacting, overreacting or letting it fester are not great methods of response. If this is your method of coping with hurt and offense, trust me, you need a new one! Repeating the cycle of offense only intensifies each time you are provoked.

I always search for a biblical strategy because that book has guided me through the darkest moments of my life. There are a few scriptures in Proverbs I want to share with you. “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but the slow to anger calms a dispute.” (Proverbs 15:18)

Our culture is excessively hot-tempered to the point hot-tempered has become the norm. But if you can stay in control of your anger, you have the power to CALM a dispute! Allowing yourself to be provoked will just add to fuel to that hot-burning fire.

But my favorite verse is in the next chapter, “He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city.” (Proverbs 16:32) If you can rule your spirit, you have the power to capture a city. More importantly, no one should have that kind of power over you.

Showing anger shows that someone else is ruling your spirit. It is through Him and with Him you can – and will – be slow to anger, gracious and compassionate. Without Him, you will continue repeating the same thing over and over again, while expecting people to treat you differently.

Looking at the past conflicts in your life, could you have responded better? Let me know! Leave me your comments below and Like and Share today’s post while you’re there.

We’ve made it to the halfway point in the week, so let’s get together this afternoon on The Dani Johnson Show at 12 pm ET/11 am CT. You can find the show on both your TV and radio and please remember you can always stream today’s show LIVE right here on our website.

In great faith,

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Join the conversation

  1. Christine July 23, 2014

    When those around you are yelling & your keeping your calm, how do you get heard?

  2. J July 23, 2014

    HI Dani
    your message is on time.
    well hope this helps someone.
    I use to and now am going back to what the Grace of God had implanted in me.
    I use to be calm one. The mistake I made was when I addressed the issue for it not to be repeated they lied. My mistake was letting it slide and so people took it as a pass.
    I choose to forgive people and meditate on the good. I was tired of addressing issues with liars who never wanted to take responsibility. That’s another mistake on my part, I tolerated it.
    I depended on God so much for strength. When things were not going my way as a result of the above mistakes. I choose to accept the LIE that God was angry with me. As a result I felt being taken advantage by both God and man and began reacting.
    By the Grace of God I am renewing my mind. Accepting His love and loving my self.
    Coming across your message is another blessings the Lord has put on my way.

  3. Jon July 23, 2014

    Would be good to share some practical tips as well rather than stating bible verses. Even though bible verses are practical tips, most people need translating into what they mean and how they can be applied to everyday life

  4. Timothy Barsby July 24, 2014

    Thank you so much Dani,
    just as read your article on turning down the heat on anger, someone wronged not even golf an hour prior to reading this. A timely and Godly reminder to keep it cool. Unfortunately I overreacted and gave away my power and control to someone who embarrassed and upset me I felt convicted afterwards but decided to take a road of forgiveness it still hurts but willing to let it go. Thanks again

  5. Paul Schmitz February 28, 2015

    I own a Facebook Page I use to run affiliate links to, which pertains to sharks.

    On one occasion I received a private message from a teenager who said he loved sharks so much that he loves to kill them. Instead of ignoring him, blocking him from the page (easy to do), and deleting whatever he wrote…I took it personal, grabbed a screen shot of the conversation and posted it on the page, where its fans value sharks more than human life.

    After realizing what I had done, I had to fly into damage control, deleted the post, and pray to God that no one found his home address (one “fan” actually found where he shopped for surf gear and sent the business a message on Facebook,) or message his mom…

    Learning from my mistake, I just had the opportunity rise again by another teenager a few minutes ago. This time, wisdom and learning from past mistakes prevailed…I just deleted the post and blocked him.