Face Your Fear Of Confrontation
Conflicts suck! Most people fear confrontation because they’ve had sour experiences in the past, when confrontations have turned into outright battles. But, believe it or not, confrontation is a skill set!
Over and over again, the Bible tells us to ask. Do you know what God’s voice sounds like? Do you know how to truly listen? This message explains how to discern the voice of God over the voice of your own flesh.
The past few Wednesdays, we’ve discussed how to truly hear God. First, it was all about asking God – for help, for ideas, for wisdom… for everything. Last week, we pinpointed how to recognize the voice of the enemy in your life. It’s so important to learn how to discern each of the 3 voices speaking to you, because you should listen to only one of those voices.
So, now can identify the voice of the enemy, it’s time to learn how to recognize your own voice. I know you’re probably saying, “Dani, what are you talking about?! I know my own voice!”
You can so easily get tripped-up and deceived into believing you are hearing from God, when you’re actually listening to your own flesh. We convince ourselves “God said…” yet it’s nothing but our own desires talking.
A lot of times, this shows up when we seek “confirmation.”
Imagine a young child, maybe 5 years old. He reeeeally wants some ice cream, so he asks his mom, “Mommy, can I have some ice cream?” But Mom says no. Not even two minutes later, the child comes back and says, “Mommy, can I PLEEEEASE have some ice cream?” And again, Mom says no. A few minutes later, the boy is back again. “Mommy, I really want some ice cream. Can I please have some?” And one more time, Mom says no.
So what does the boy do now? He certainly doesn’t give up. He wants the ice cream, so he asks someone else! “Daddy, can I have some ice cream?” Dad says, “Sure, buddy! Let’s go!”
When we ask God for things, it’s easy to get focused on the outcome WE want. But by being so attached to the outcome, we become that little boy. We ask, and when we don’t hear the answer we want, we keep asking, hoping for a different answer. However, when God doesn’t change His mind, we believe we can’t possibly be hearing from God. So, we decide to go ask someone who will give us the answer we want.
When that other someone gives us the answer we want, we take it as “confirmation” and assume we have finally heard from God.
I’ve heard people say, “I know God wants me to do this, because I have peace about it.” Yet, the only confirmation they have is their own personal feeling of peace. Can you see how listening to your own fleshly desires can get you into trouble?
I have to tell you a story, about how I got into radio, as an example of seeking confirmation and truly waiting on the Lord – instead of pushing your own agenda.
Ten years ago, I read a book about a woman who began her career in radio, and as I read how she used to preach on the radio, I could feel the Holy Spirit all over me. I thought, “This might be God.” But I left it alone. I didn’t jump up and say, “Oh my gosh, Hans, we HAVE to do this! Let’s start a radio show!”
You see, if you wait upon the Lord, He will build it. But if you follow your own agenda, it’s built on quicksand and it will not last or be blessed.
About a week later, I read another story and the same thing happened – I got chills all over my body and started to cry. But again, this was not confirmation.
Later that year, our team moved into a bigger office. The office my husband chose for me actually used to be an old radio studio. I had not said a word to Hans about any of this, yet for some reason he decided the best place for my desk was in this old studio. Still, this was not enough confirmation for me to move forward with getting started in radio.
A month later, when we returned home from vacation, I went into my office and JP had bought me a radio mic to use for our training calls. NOW, I was shocked! I went to Hans and said, “Hans, I have to tell you something.” And I told him the story of all 4 things that had happened throughout the previous year. I said, “I’m not saying we’re supposed to do it. I don’t know if it will ever happen. I don’t even listen to the radio! I don’t like the radio! I can’t stand preachers on the radio. But let’s just pray, because these 4 things that have happened are a little odd.”
Then 4 years later, a radio station in Florida called, saying they would like to give me my own show. They would take care of all the technical stuff and everything. But, I still wasn’t convinced and said, “God, if this is from you, please speak through Hans and give me more confirmation.”
So, I told Hans about the phone call. He said, “Hey, you’ve got nothing to lose. If you want to take the time to do it, go for it!”
I started listening to some of the other shows on this station, and to be honest with you, they sucked! I did NOT want to be like that! I knew if I wanted to do this, it had to be with excellence and diligence! I hired a radio coach in January 2010 and invested thousands of dollars into radio education.
Diving in head-first, I began my first radio show on that little station in Florida. When summer rolled around, I took some time off to go on a family vacation. And, to my surprise, I really missed radio! I couldn’t wait to get back! When I got home, I was hungrier than ever and ready to go all-in.
In January 2012, we launched our nationally-syndicated radio show – exactly 7 years after the idea of radio dropped into my spirit. And God has blessed this show in the 3 years since we started!
Had I not waited for confirmation – and I mean REAL confirmation – I have no idea what would have happened. But I’m so grateful I’ve learned to ask God for His confirmation, rather than act on my own emotions, my own desires, my own vain imagination!
So much blessing waits for you when you hear and obey God! I want that for you, so I’m taking several weeks to further in depth on this topic.
Please take a few minutes right now to evaluate your life. What confirmation are you seeking today? Have you asked God for confirmation for anything? Write those things down. When you get confirmation, write down exactly what happened and when. When you go back and look at those notes, you will be amazed, and it will be a beautiful picture of God’s faithfulness – just like when I look back at the story of how I got into radio.
Ask God to show you where you may be attached to your outcome, instead of His real answer. Ask Him to show you anything in your life where you have listened to your own flesh and your own desires, instead of listening to Him. Take some time today to journal about these things.
And join me again Wednesday for the next piece of this message. You’re going to discover how God talks to you, what His voice sounds like, and how to KNOW it’s His voice you’re hearing!
In the meantime, I would love to hear about your experiences on today’s topic, so please leave me your comments below. Then be sure to share this message with your friends and family!
Be sure to tune in to The Dani Johnson Show today for a special Spiritual Equipping message! You can find the show on your TV and radio and remember you can always stream today’s show right here on our website.
In great faith,
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