No matter who you are, you have negative influences in your life! It doesn’t matter if you already are successful, if you are in debt, if you married, single, still in high school. All demographics and all ages have negative influences.
Negative people are negative. They complain, they murmur. Their words are judgment, criticism and jealousy. They pick everyone else apart, and it’s the life they have chosen – their words do not speak life, they only speak dirt and death. It could be your family, your friends, peers, or coworkers.
And I can guarantee the second you try to be successful, or you actually gain a little success under your belt, these people will try to cut you down. They will get you to second guess yourself and your dreams. And more often than not, they get you to settle. In fact if you aren’t making waves, you aren’t doing enough! When you step out and start making a change in your life and creating success, you WILL catch people’s attention. If people start talking bad about you because of it, you know you’re doing something right!
What you have to realize is some people are happy stuck in their rut. Give them their KFC and their favorite movie and they will sit on the couch, fat and happy, cutting down others who are looking for more in life. So let them! If they are happy where they are, let them. But it doesn’t mean you have to live that life or accept the criticisms and negativity that comes out of their mouth.
So then what do you do? If there will always be negativity surrounding you, how do you get rid of it? Well, you can’t! But there are ways to use it for good, and not let it bring you down. Here’s how negative influences serve their purpose:
1. To test how badly you want your goal! When you hear discouragement, your job is to not to crumble.
- If you get discouraged easily, seek encouragement frequently.
- Don’t use their words as excuses – excuses are well planned lies. Get up and keep pushing forward!
2. To set a standard.
- Negative people act as an example for how you don’t want to be! In turn this helps you define who you do want to be!
3. They serve as a goal. Negative people are a hurdle, a bar you need to overcome
- Someone in life has to have regrets. Someone has to eat crow.
- So make sure it isn’t you!
Negative influences come from people who have no dreams, so they think small. This negativity comes their insecurities, their excuses. You can choose to let them effect you, or you can be the example. You can encourage them to dream. Some of them will see your results and lose their negativity, while others are happy the way they are. And both are fine! The important thing is to not let their dreams (or lack thereof) or their insecurities have any ruling over how you live your life!
It is your choice to let negative people affect you! Realize some of these negative people in your life, genuinely LOVE you. They could be your parents even! Some of these negative words come from protection, and personal insecurities.
So here’s how to deal:
- Heap hot coals. Cover them with kindness! Meet them with encouragement!
Quit waiting for people to be perfect to start encouraging them, stop waiting for them to make you happy before you start encouraging them. Encourage them now and you might notice them starting to encourage you back!
- Don’t talk like them. You don’t want to be like them, so don’t talk like them! Don’t whine or complain, or be negative back to them. Instead of responding with sarcastic comments, answer your critics with results!
- Whatever you focus on, is what you get good at. So, stop focusing on who is against you. Stop focusing on who is putting you down. Find who is for you and who is encouraging you.
Environment is everything!
Analyze your environment, who are you talking to and what about? What movies are you watching, and what books are you reading? What goes in, will come out! What you feed will flourish, what you neglect will die. Stop complaining about the negative people and negative influences. If you focus, or feed the negativity, you will get negativity back! Start encouraging people around you and you may find they start encouraging you back!
Whether or not you are successful, not everyone will be on your side. You don’t need everybody to be FOR you, you only need one person! So stop focusing on who isn’t behind you, and start looking for people or that one person who is for you. If you can’t find anyone in your personal life, get connected on our Facebook! We are here FOR you, to speak life into you. We want you to succeed, as well as the rest of the community here. Get plugged in, and start dreaming!